This is Lutheran Satire and very funny. But despite the satire, it is motivating me to market my parish to those pesky young people who demand a church they can stomach. First here is the Lutheran satire, followed by my new marketing strategies:
Lutheran Satire educates
Thus, Saint Anne’s Catholic Church will now be known as “The Community of Sin as you Please and Endless Enablement.” These are our 10 recommendations which anyone can take or leave depending on their discernment and who discerns with them as they are accompanied in a variety of lifestyles that The Community of Sin as You Please...” makes no judgements because who are we to judge us?
1. Thou shalt have as many gods and goddesses and genderless ones too, as you please
2. Use whatever language you please to speak about your higher power as freedom of speech has no bounds.
3. Worship with us or not because Holy is the Lord’s Day with or without you.
4. Honor your feelings about how to take care of your elders because love is never having to say you are sorry.
5. Life is only worth living until it is an inconvenience to someone, so make your choices about life as you please.
6. Sex is normal, so do as you please, what you do in this community stays in this community
7. Everything is interrelated in our common house so take what you want without guilt
8. Speak your mind and be brutally honest especially about juicy news
9. Since we all need to share, no problem sharing spouses since we are all interrelated
10. Take what you need from your neighbors and no need to return if you are attached to their possessions.
1 comment:
And maybe the next pastor "under such leadership" should be Robert Francis O'Rourke. Political junkies know him better as "Beto". you know, the guy who wants to take away tax exemptions for churches which do not preform same-sex marriages.
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